I don't have anything particularly important to say, but I just wanted to write.

I've been taking my time reading Smoke and Mirrors (the fourth Gaiman book for me to read so far), randomly picking a short story and carefully relishing and unwrapping each literary gem one by one, like little presents a kid gets on her birthday (my favorite is Queen of Knives). There's still so much I haven't read yet. And today I threw my hands down, gave in and let them snip away at my hair just to get the vultures off my back, and I look like... nevermind.

And.

A few minutes ago I'd just gotten off the phone with X- and A- and A- and there are times, such as tonight, when I just want to tell people how fond I am of them and say "I love you" the number of times it takes until I start feeling awkward with exposing that much emotion but I don't because I'm scared that it might start to lose its meaning.

There are a lot of things I'm not sure of and might never be sure of, and who knows when the gray cloud withholding me from figuring my way around this labyrinth of life might evaporate, but there's one thing I'm certain of: I will never get tired of listening to them speak, even when background noises get irritating and the occasional bouts of silence become deafening. There's so much I'm earnestly thankful for, like how X- reached out after a year of silence and how A- did after two. So much has changed since then, and not necessarily for the better. But I'm happy.

So maybe I take back that first sentence. I do have something important to say.

I love you.